CINDERELLA
Sunday, April 21, 2013
I wonder what am I feeling now is it really love or is it just an illusion that my heart creates at the slightest bit of attention or the feeling of affection my heart gets ? Well, that is something that I should reflect on cause sometimes my heart likes to have an argument with my brain and I don't really know who shall I listen to at times. But then, that is another story.
Captivating sometimes I feel how can somebody or someone just take your breath away and sweep you off your feet to the seventh heaven and then just leave you hanging the next day ? In simplified words, someone can tell you how much you mean to them in a day and treat you like the princess you deserve and the next day you feel like oh god damn did the clock struck 12am ? Why did everything changed ?
And these few weeks or days okay days to be exact I feel like cinderella. Where all my dreams come true in finding a prince charming and then when the clock strikes twelve midnight, everything is back to normal. No more beautiful shimmering overflown gown, no more glass slippers and also no more nice hair and perfect make up whatsoever and most importantly no more dancing through the night or having a nice time with the man of your dreams. All I'm left is ragged clothes, messy hair, smeared mascara and the guy ? Poof ! Vanish in mid air. Except I'm talking all this figuratively, it's not as bad as it sounds but in a way it is.
Sometimes, I asked myself, why do I even do this ? Everyday checking my phone, waiting for his call and do all sorts of stuff to get his attention when he is just keeping calm and all. Guys are really from mars aren't they. I can seem to fathom what are they trying to make out.
Maybe I should get the hint. People think we're cute and happy and all but sometimes I don't really think so. But then again, I can't expect a guy to give me attention like every five seconds right ? That is definitely stupid and clingy. But just so you know, a simple message or just a slight gesture can tell a girl that you actually care for her and sometimes you value the relationship more than she does. I know it's good that you called and text and all but sometimes I feel that you kind of neglect me.
Anyway I'm not really your girlfriend so fuck me for blabbing on how am I feeling this way. I think we have this love-hate relationship or what.
Top of it all, I appreciate every single thing you do even the slightest thing that I told you a few decades back and you remember really make my heart soar to the moon and back. See, you can show affection if you want just that maybe it's your alter ego. I don't know. Our late night conversations mean more to me than you ever know.
Just so you know, I don't hate you. It's just that it is just a random thought. And I'm not being nonchalant okay. I still like you though. :) xx
ps: is this my longest post this year ?
Labels: love, Random blah's, rant
2:17 PM